Discover more from Who the Heck Is Jim Treacher
Musk Triggers Mass Journophrenia
Journos love free speech unless it's yours
A lot of people are already freaking out over the prospect of Elon Musk buying Twitter, before he’s even spent a dime. We call these people “journalists.”
There are too many examples of this mass journophrenia to count, but here’s my favorite one so far:
Damn straight. If you want to lie to people, you need to get your own show on MSNBC.
Journos are now brazenly calling for censorship. They’re panicking that Elon Musk will take over their favorite bird website and let anybody say whatever they want. Just imagine all the precious egos that will be shattered.
These political activists with press passes have always thought they’re better than you and hated you for disagreeing, but now they’re not even pretending to give a damn about free speech.
That’s because we’re not their audience. We’re their competitors.
They’ve got bills to pay and nannies to feed, you filthy peasants. Stop heckling them!
I’m a Musk agnostic, but he sure is showing us who these arrogant buttholes really are. And all he has to do is exhibit a base understanding of free speech:
“Is someone you don’t like allowed to say something you don’t like? And if that is the case, then we have free speech.”
This attitude is #libertarianAF and I’m all for it. When someone tells a lie, you respond with the truth. Then you let everybody decide for themselves who’s right. You won’t always win out, but that’s the price of freedom.
What you don’t do is silence people for spreading “misinformation,” because sometimes you’ll get it wrong. Sometimes it’s just plain ol’ information.
Or have we all forgotten this?
If the journos had their way, you never would’ve known anything about Hunter Biden’s abandoned laptop full of incriminating evidence of his ongoing criminal conspiracy with his father. Because having that information might make you vote the wrong way.
And that’s fascism! Stop bringing up facts that make Democrats look bad, you Nazi.
As for Musk’s Plan B if this doesn’t work:
I’m telling you, if Elon Musk tweets a Dr. Evil GIF right now, he wins 46 states in 2024.
Oh, Joe Biden is doing just fine. Why do you ask?
“Where am I and where do I go now?” asked the leader of the free world.
If Trump runs again and wins — which I’m supposed to prefer, apparently — he’ll be 78 years young on Inauguration Day 2025. Sorry, but we need somebody in that office who didn’t watch brand-new episodes of The Honeymooners.
Speaking of old people who should retire, Dianne Feinstein has obviously outlived her usefulness to the Democratic Party, because now she’s getting trashed by the left. They’re putting her on an ice floe and pushing her out to sea.
Not that I’ll miss Feinstein, but at least she has an excuse for her bad memory. She’s pushing 90! What about all these libs trying to oust her while ignoring Biden’s obvious mental decline? Are their memories going as well? Nah, they just don’t care about anything but power.
As an American and a Hoosier, I really like Amy Coney Barrett.
Here’s what the dumb protester screamed: “Amy Coney Barrett, you are an enslaver of women!” God bless the United States of America, where you can gain clout by pretending to be oppressed.
The Central Alaskan Yup’ik language has about 20,000 speakers. That’s bigger than the subscriber base of CNN+.
I don’t talk much about music on here, because there hasn’t been much to talk about. The Billboard Hot 100 might as well be from another planet. Guess I’m stuck in the ‘90s.
So it’s nice to have this guy back:
It’s very loud and very weird and I like it:
What would you call that? Minimalist electronic disco-punk? Dunno, I’m not a music critic. Whatever it is, it’s still rock and roll to me.
The new album also has a song with Q-Tip. Maybe White listened to that BlakRoc album the Black Keys put out and said, “I can beat that.”
White also got married onstage during a concert in his hometown of Detroit last week:
His new bride is named Olivia Jean, and here she is:
Okay, yeah, of course Jack White married this woman onstage. Duh.
Remember when Joe Rogan slapped Chris Rock for saying “horse medicine”? Man, I miss the ‘20s.
A few of you had some suggestions after I lamented my chronic knee pain yesterday, so thank you for that. I did pick up a tube of Voltaren (diclofenac sodium) a while back after seeing that commercial with the crazy dancing guy, but then I got intimidated by the long list of warnings. You need to use a precise dosage, it can raise your blood pressure and/or damage your liver and kidneys, may cause stomach bleeding and cardiac arrest, etc. I’ll just limp around in pain, thanks!
Arnica gel was another suggestion, so I’ll see if that one can kill me...
TGIF, and thanks for reading. Please subscribe to this newsletter so I can keep writing it.
Who the Heck Is Jim Treacher? is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.
Why you haven’t you subscribed already? You’ve been reading me for months and you still aren’t paying me. Is this how you were raised, going around taking handouts? Do you fill up on the free samples at the grocery store without buying anything, you miser? Low-rent behavior, dude. What’s wrong with you?