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Dec 2, 2022
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Dec 2, 2022
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"The beautiful thing about being outside both parties is that you can see the "theater" at play."

I wish more people could just pull back a level and see this. They Sound Bite Rage all over The Other Guys "We hates 'em!!!" on the Talking Head shows but, come Happy Hour, they're all sipping their $27 Shirley Temples all "So, Edgar - how are the grandkids?" "Just happen to have some pictures right here, Ellsworth, from their ski trip to the Alps."

Bi-partisan is the dirtiest word there is.

Bipartisan is what happens when the (R) comes in and says "I've got this really crappy idea for a law." and the (D) comes in and say, "You think that's crappy, let's throw this in as well." Then Rs are like "we got what we want!" and Ds are all "we didn't let them get it without a cost!" It just means two really crappy laws (read: "Money Pits") are enacted, no one's safer, and the only people who prosper are the guys in the smoke-filled rooms.

We the Little People get a tax increase and scolded for not being more compassionate to our fellow man.

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Dec 2, 2022Edited
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Dec 2, 2022
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Come on in. We have nachos!

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I like to think of myself as "anti-partisan". I pretty much hate them all. My grandpa always said he was "an Ag'inner". If any party wanted the govt to do anything, he was ag'in it.

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One of the reasons I enjoy Jim's columns so much (other than his writing talent) is because it is NOT exclusively political commentary. Who wants to exist in that vacuum?

It's a perfect blend of life on this Earth.

Knowing what to take seriously, what is theatre of the absurd, and what is just a barrel of fun.

If it was politics all the time I would have been out of here a long time ago - and never been a paid subscriber.

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Dec 2, 2022Edited
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I have found that identifying myself as "a philosophical anarchist but a practical strong libertarian" most people are confused and just leave me alone politically (probably for fear I'm as pushy about it as a vegan or 7th Day Adventist).

My whole family (my side, not my wife's) is the kind of hillbilly "Leave me alone and I'll leave you alone, but mess with me and you'll be sorry" moderately traditionalist moderate conservatives. And they think I'm weird.

And I feel sorry for Cubs fans (my wife's family), and their plaintive cry of "Wait 'til next century!"

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Dec 2, 2022
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We shall see, shan't we.

I was born and raised in that swath of Illinois that has about 50/50 Cubs fans vs Cardinal fans. My late uncle took me to Cards games despite being a Cubs fan, because in the 1950s St Louis was only a 3 hour or so drive while to Wrigley it was more like 9 hours. Anyway, it pretty much made me a Cards fan. Where I grew up it was a pretty friendly rivalry, and in the 50s neither team was usually that good. I can remember the Cubs announced attendance for a weekday game being 800+

I went to a Cards Sunday doubleheader (with my uncle) and maybe 10,000 people at Sportsman's Field (or Park -- I forget). But we fans teased each other a lot. And Cards games were easier to pick up on radio KMOX because they had night games. I don't remember the Cubs Chicago station, but day games were all but impossible to get unless they were broadcast on Springfield IL stations, and not all were.

But based on history, I'm sure the Cubs fans can look forward to another World Series championship around 2125 or so. "Live long and prosper!"

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That's it!

The Hillbilly Leave Me Alone Party.

Taking names - who wants in?

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Dec 2, 2022
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Dec 2, 2022
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Lol. I wasn’t criticizing. It was an observation.

That’s one of the things I dislike about the internet. Things you write don’t sound the same as they do in verbal conversations.

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Dec 2, 2022Edited
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See, when I tell unTex he's a hoopy frood, he stops for a moment, thinks "Can I take Pi's word for it?"

Of course not. It has to be somebody _trustworthy_ or something. Whatever.

*stomps off*

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Sarcasm is very hard on the innertubez fer sure.

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Whatever. Just bring me The Batman. Or The Chris Cillizza.

It doesn't really matter. They're both make-believe people.

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"While our Political Class is almost wholly a confederation of stooges"

More like a Confederacy of Dunces

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Dec 2, 2022
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"we ignore black bigots"

I am reliably told that black people can't be racist.

"I'm tired of games like this from everybody. Full stop."

Gawd, yes.

I once had a discussion with a computer programmer for the Federal Government. He's from Columbia but is a Navy vet and citizen. Smart guy. Anyway, he said "My office is the most diverse group I've ever worked with." So I asked, "How many white people?" This caught him off guard as he kinda slowly acknowledged, "1." I don't know many people are on his team but, whatever their number, it appears that a truly "diverse" group of people would have included more than 1.

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Dec 2, 2022Edited
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All those people from Yale and Harvard look the same to me. *shrug*

It's not diverse. Sometimes, as in my friend above's case, diverse just means "All non-white people." If you're not white I doubt it hits you.

A commenter on another site years ago made a point about how he had more in common with his Pakistani doctor than the rednecks at the Dew Drop Inn (I'm embellishing here a bit) and that he wouldn't really choose to be around "people like him" because - get this - they weren't [edit] really like _him_ except in skin tone.

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That's kind of funny to me, since I grew up with rednecks, hillbillies, and good ol' boys and am still accepted when I go there, but I earned advanced degrees and had a lot in common with my various Indian (Asian-type in the Detroit area) docs and my Iranian GE doc, and my Muslim dentist, and my Black cardiologist (when I got rushed to an ER because my Slovakian dentist got my heartrate at 32 (when he could find it at all) prior to a surgical procedure), and my Iraqi Radiation cancer doc, and . . .

I'm beginning to think maybe cis white males might not be the only bigots.

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Well, we do have some wackos and weirdos. So we got that diversity going for us.

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Dec 2, 2022
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On Bane, agreed!

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Is it over when the fat lady sings?

I just can't get over the guy's hair. Maximum bowl cut!

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Is the rising sea level the reason his pants are so high? Were they wearing safety vests to warn bystanders of the industrial grade stupidity they carried? What if there were no rhetorical questions?

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"What if there were no rhetorical questions?"

You want me to answer that?

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LOL

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Please let me steal that! God, hilarious!

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File the numbers off, who'll ever know the difference?

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Ghost snark

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Wow! I laughed so hard at the protesters being carried out I nearly lost my coffee! Just. Perfect.

And I had not seen Joe Biden calling France "Frank". BTW, as happy as I am with the CNN firings, we need more, like Lemon, gone.

I'm glad you were onto Kanye so far back. His bipolarity is riding him. Even Elon had to ban him again.

Indiana Jones will truly suck. The Left has killed Star Wars, Marvel and Disney. They killed the James Bond franchise. I'm surprised they haven't both race- and gender-swapped Indy. Will they have him toss his whip away like Luke Skywalker does his light saber? Dial M for Metamucil is hilarious. A takeoff on Dial M for Murder or Dial H for Hero?

I have to hit the tip jar for this column.

Merry Christmas.

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"Dial M for Metamucil is hilarious"

That was really good. I don't even know how to work that into a future joke of my own, it's just so stand-alone.

Bravo.

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I saw a great video yesterday commenting that we used to eagerly await seeing our favorite stories become motion pictures. Now when we see the trailers we just cringe and say, "Please, no."

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Yeah. I liked Lord of the Rings. I discovered the books while confined to an Air Force hospital bed in Colorado. I had read everything else in the small hospital library (a nice lady brought books around in a cart. She quickly just began leaving 10 or so at a time with me) and that was all that was left, so I sighed and dug in. Fell in love, of course.

I was dreading the movies (it really needed the "Scouring of the Shire, I still think) but found it more than acceptable. I got the extended Director's cut or whatever, and like that even more. Not perfect, but a very good job.

Took my kids to see Star Wars on the opening weekend. Too bad what they did to it.

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I know the last movie would have been too long but The Scouring of the Shire is important in that it's how the Hobbitonites found out that Frodo and his Posse didn't just go bar hopping for a year.

They came back legit. It's why Sam ended up as mayor, I suspect.

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1) Wouldn't it be easier to just *jerk* their glued hands loose? Something's going to give there!

2) I hate FJB with the heat of a thousand suns, but I couldn't hear "Frank" in there.

3) It's Christmas. All tips given should be bigger, especially Jim's!

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"1) Wouldn't it be easier to just *jerk* their glued hands loose?" Or how about gluing some other parts of their anatomy in interesting ways? If they want to be glued down, let's help them out!

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This review of the new Indy movie is NSFW. Vulgar and hilarious: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8395JgNJ0sg

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I love Drinker's Razor. It explains a lot.

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I will say this about Kanye: musically, he is a genius. And, like many a genius, he is completely off his rails.

About the "environmental" "protest" - I really didn't see Harry Potter being a chubby chaser. Huh. Who knew?

I will also say this about these low-energy protestors who glue themselves to something to get my attention; why, why, WHY dear sweet merciful jeebus am I no where near when this is going down?

About the Indian Jones trailer: from what I heard out there, they're gonna ret-con the entire Indy history so that Fleabag *is* Indy.

This is my source - https://youtu.be/am2UYowqhu8

Sure, he's a robot who wants to take over earth, but he's an honest robot who wants to take over earth.

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My wife, bless her heart, binged watched "Fleabag" with me in the room. I understood there was some comedy in there, but I couldn't find it. Sorta like that Australian standup nutbag female. To whom is that stuff funny?

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Dec 2, 2022
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Hannah Gadsby. I had to look her up. 'They' tried to shove her up my nose. Maybe the word comedy means something different in Australian.

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Dec 2, 2022
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LOL

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*Googles Hannah Gadsby*

*convulses in chair*

That's it, Jorg. You are on The List now.

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As far as "grab-bag" days go, today is some of the grab-baggiest. That's a great thing!

Kanye: said some things some conservatives liked, everything else was bad. Just because a broken clock is right twice a day doesn't mean it's a good clock. Shame on the people who thought Ye was a great endorsement of Trump or something.

Mike Myers: ...yeah, lol

Climate Protesters: The saddest thing about a lot of these people is that their passion does seem genuine. If we didn't live in post-modern times that passion would have been channeled into doing some actual good, like volunteering at a homeless shelter, joining the Peace Corps, or hell if they want to "do something for the environment" there are tons of recycling centers/trash-ridden highways/trees that need planting types of opportunities. These people have been lied to about the "good" they are doing. Add nothing to the world and want to be applauded for it.

Chris Cizzila/Indy: These things seem like they were relevant to the culture some time ago, but not in the present.

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People with time on their hands tend to fashion it into some passion, whether it's Star Trek or feminism, or politics. They need a home team to root for and opposition to fight against. And since "All's fair in love and war" they can fight as dirty as they like.

Just look, in general, not who leads these various crusades but who supplies the muscle. People with time on their hands. Especially if they don't need (or have) an actual job. Musk shed 75% plus of "time-servers" from Twitter and it's still up and running. Those who 'left' obviously had lots of time on their hands to provide muscle for the Cancel Culture, and could feel virtuous about it while getting higjly paid.

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I first became aware of Kanye West when that video of him making an ass of himself at an awards show made the rounds. At that time I couldn't really tell if he was actually crazy/mentally disturbed, or a master showman seriously pushing the boundaries, but I knew I would never be a fan. It was the same for me as with Andy Kaufman. Just because some real geniuses have been a bit crazy doesn't mean every crazy person is a genius.

And I get really tired of having the mentally unbalanced/challenged shoved into my face as if they speak with the voice of God.

Although, come to think of it, that has a long history of cultures that crazy people have been "touched by god" so we should pay attention to them. That's the origin of the Greek word "charisma" and one reason the Oracle at Delphi got paid attention to.

The more things change the more they remain the same, I guess. (I can't remember the Frank phrase for that.)

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Dec 2, 2022
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True enough, but while I still appreciate a good fart joke, I was never really a Stooges fan, either. I can understand why many people are, but for me comedy is a lot like pro wrestling: either you like or you don't, without much in-between.

I would never, however, sneer at what someone else finds funny. Humor is as humor hits you, I think.

I also have a hard time enjoy tv comedies that seem to require otherwise intelligent people to be routinely stupid in contrast to their 'normal' behavior. So I liked Cheers but not Frasier. Loved Big Bang Theory, not so much (or at all) Seinfeld.

But if they make others laugh, I'm good with that.

It's like me liking scotch but not bourbon (it always tastes to me like a mouthful of flowers) or beer (many kinds) but not wine (with a few exceptions). Tastes vary, and I'm totally okay with that.

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Dec 2, 2022
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I like beer in my beer. I love the German beer purity laws. I am willing to try fruit- or spice-flavored beers, but have yet to find one I really like. I can handle about one raspberry beer then I'm done.

My wife says scotch smells like medicine, and all I can reply is "So?" Bourbon to me, really tastes like aftershave smells. I'd rather pass on your expensive bourbon and let you enjoy it. And the only mixed drink I've ever cared for is a really good original recipe Margarita. I still remember my introduction to it, some 55 years ago.

Oh, and I can sip and enjoy some really good rum.

Slainte!

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I, too, love the Rheinheitsgebot! I used to drink Beck's from Germany. They got bought out by Anheuser-Busch, then Inbev. They stink. Thank God for the Craft Beer Revolution and IPAs. I'm a Dogfish Head 90-minute IPA guy.

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"I'm glad we are mature enough to accept each the other's preferences and tastes without making a judgement of the person"

I don't know, man. Preferring Scotch to Bourbon makes me wonder. Jorg's also the one that got me to Google that Hannah chick/dude.

*eyes Jorg suspiciously*

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No one, least of all me, 'made' you google Hannah OhMyGodsby. That's on you. As an adult jelly donut you should accept the responsibility for your own unwise choices. js

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Dec 3, 2022
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Not a fan of flatulence "humor," but the Stooges weren't that; they were slapstick--and funny as heck. Very much a guy thing humor-wise though. Scotch is a rare thing for me. I've made my own wine, so wine AND beer are good. So was Cheers. I binge-watched Frasier well after it went off the air and laughed like hell.

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I just mean that I have a juvenile sense of humor at times, but the Stooges just aren't my thing.

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I put "the more things change the more they stay the same into my English-to-Frank translator and got this:

“plus ça change, plus c'est la même chose“

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That's it. "Things that 'Frank' says."

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"Pardon my Frank?"

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Cillizza is right up there with Ian Milhiser and Jim Acosta for the "Weird and Wrong Journalist" list.

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Re. Biden and the Franks.

I assume Biden is old enough to remember the Franks. And assumed his state dinner was hosting Charlemagne.

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Holy Roman Emporere [Pi edit: Great Loki, wth is that word??], bitches!

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I still haven't broken in these rented fingers yet. Bear with me.

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Bidet is thinking of Charlegmagne "Tha" God...

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I will give you an extra $5 in cash on top of what I've already paid for subscription and friendship if you stop doing the TGIF thing.

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Nooooo!

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Had the same thought when I saw the photo of the protesters in the hallway.

It was almost as funny as those guys who glued their hands to a Volkswagen floor & then were mad when the lights were turned out on them & they hadn't factored in how they were going to eat & go to the bathroom.

https://www.msn.com/en-us/autos/news/climate-protestors-who-glued-themselves-to-volkswagens-floor-are-left-in-the-dark/ar-AA13be2b

Mental giants, all.

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I hope after the concert was over everyone just turned off the lights and left. Lol. Maybe put them back in the podium

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Wouldn't that have been a hoot!

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How arrogantly presumptuous of Joe Biden to act like he's on a first-name basis with France.

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