66 Comments
Comment removed
Expand full comment
Comment removed
Expand full comment

"The beautiful thing about being outside both parties is that you can see the "theater" at play."

I wish more people could just pull back a level and see this. They Sound Bite Rage all over The Other Guys "We hates 'em!!!" on the Talking Head shows but, come Happy Hour, they're all sipping their $27 Shirley Temples all "So, Edgar - how are the grandkids?" "Just happen to have some pictures right here, Ellsworth, from their ski trip to the Alps."

Bi-partisan is the dirtiest word there is.

Bipartisan is what happens when the (R) comes in and says "I've got this really crappy idea for a law." and the (D) comes in and say, "You think that's crappy, let's throw this in as well." Then Rs are like "we got what we want!" and Ds are all "we didn't let them get it without a cost!" It just means two really crappy laws (read: "Money Pits") are enacted, no one's safer, and the only people who prosper are the guys in the smoke-filled rooms.

We the Little People get a tax increase and scolded for not being more compassionate to our fellow man.

Expand full comment
RemovedDec 2, 2022·edited Dec 2, 2022
Comment removed
Expand full comment
Comment removed
Expand full comment

Come on in. We have nachos!

Expand full comment

I like to think of myself as "anti-partisan". I pretty much hate them all. My grandpa always said he was "an Ag'inner". If any party wanted the govt to do anything, he was ag'in it.

Expand full comment
founding

One of the reasons I enjoy Jim's columns so much (other than his writing talent) is because it is NOT exclusively political commentary. Who wants to exist in that vacuum?

It's a perfect blend of life on this Earth.

Knowing what to take seriously, what is theatre of the absurd, and what is just a barrel of fun.

If it was politics all the time I would have been out of here a long time ago - and never been a paid subscriber.

Expand full comment
RemovedDec 2, 2022·edited Dec 2, 2022
Comment removed
Expand full comment

I have found that identifying myself as "a philosophical anarchist but a practical strong libertarian" most people are confused and just leave me alone politically (probably for fear I'm as pushy about it as a vegan or 7th Day Adventist).

My whole family (my side, not my wife's) is the kind of hillbilly "Leave me alone and I'll leave you alone, but mess with me and you'll be sorry" moderately traditionalist moderate conservatives. And they think I'm weird.

And I feel sorry for Cubs fans (my wife's family), and their plaintive cry of "Wait 'til next century!"

Expand full comment
Comment removed
Expand full comment

We shall see, shan't we.

I was born and raised in that swath of Illinois that has about 50/50 Cubs fans vs Cardinal fans. My late uncle took me to Cards games despite being a Cubs fan, because in the 1950s St Louis was only a 3 hour or so drive while to Wrigley it was more like 9 hours. Anyway, it pretty much made me a Cards fan. Where I grew up it was a pretty friendly rivalry, and in the 50s neither team was usually that good. I can remember the Cubs announced attendance for a weekday game being 800+

I went to a Cards Sunday doubleheader (with my uncle) and maybe 10,000 people at Sportsman's Field (or Park -- I forget). But we fans teased each other a lot. And Cards games were easier to pick up on radio KMOX because they had night games. I don't remember the Cubs Chicago station, but day games were all but impossible to get unless they were broadcast on Springfield IL stations, and not all were.

But based on history, I'm sure the Cubs fans can look forward to another World Series championship around 2125 or so. "Live long and prosper!"

Expand full comment

That's it!

The Hillbilly Leave Me Alone Party.

Taking names - who wants in?

Expand full comment
Comment removed
Expand full comment
Comment removed
Expand full comment
founding

Lol. I wasn’t criticizing. It was an observation.

That’s one of the things I dislike about the internet. Things you write don’t sound the same as they do in verbal conversations.

Expand full comment
RemovedDec 2, 2022·edited Dec 2, 2022
Comment removed
Expand full comment

See, when I tell unTex he's a hoopy frood, he stops for a moment, thinks "Can I take Pi's word for it?"

Of course not. It has to be somebody _trustworthy_ or something. Whatever.

*stomps off*

Expand full comment

Sarcasm is very hard on the innertubez fer sure.

Expand full comment

Whatever. Just bring me The Batman. Or The Chris Cillizza.

It doesn't really matter. They're both make-believe people.

Expand full comment

"While our Political Class is almost wholly a confederation of stooges"

More like a Confederacy of Dunces

Expand full comment
Comment removed
Expand full comment

"we ignore black bigots"

I am reliably told that black people can't be racist.

"I'm tired of games like this from everybody. Full stop."

Gawd, yes.

I once had a discussion with a computer programmer for the Federal Government. He's from Columbia but is a Navy vet and citizen. Smart guy. Anyway, he said "My office is the most diverse group I've ever worked with." So I asked, "How many white people?" This caught him off guard as he kinda slowly acknowledged, "1." I don't know many people are on his team but, whatever their number, it appears that a truly "diverse" group of people would have included more than 1.

Expand full comment
RemovedDec 2, 2022·edited Dec 2, 2022
Comment removed
Expand full comment
Dec 2, 2022·edited Dec 2, 2022

All those people from Yale and Harvard look the same to me. *shrug*

It's not diverse. Sometimes, as in my friend above's case, diverse just means "All non-white people." If you're not white I doubt it hits you.

A commenter on another site years ago made a point about how he had more in common with his Pakistani doctor than the rednecks at the Dew Drop Inn (I'm embellishing here a bit) and that he wouldn't really choose to be around "people like him" because - get this - they weren't [edit] really like _him_ except in skin tone.

Expand full comment

That's kind of funny to me, since I grew up with rednecks, hillbillies, and good ol' boys and am still accepted when I go there, but I earned advanced degrees and had a lot in common with my various Indian (Asian-type in the Detroit area) docs and my Iranian GE doc, and my Muslim dentist, and my Black cardiologist (when I got rushed to an ER because my Slovakian dentist got my heartrate at 32 (when he could find it at all) prior to a surgical procedure), and my Iraqi Radiation cancer doc, and . . .

I'm beginning to think maybe cis white males might not be the only bigots.

Expand full comment

Well, we do have some wackos and weirdos. So we got that diversity going for us.

Expand full comment
Comment removed
Expand full comment

On Bane, agreed!

Expand full comment

Is it over when the fat lady sings?

I just can't get over the guy's hair. Maximum bowl cut!

Expand full comment
founding

Is the rising sea level the reason his pants are so high? Were they wearing safety vests to warn bystanders of the industrial grade stupidity they carried? What if there were no rhetorical questions?

Expand full comment

"What if there were no rhetorical questions?"

You want me to answer that?

Expand full comment

Please let me steal that! God, hilarious!

Expand full comment

File the numbers off, who'll ever know the difference?

Expand full comment

Ghost snark

Expand full comment

Wow! I laughed so hard at the protesters being carried out I nearly lost my coffee! Just. Perfect.

And I had not seen Joe Biden calling France "Frank". BTW, as happy as I am with the CNN firings, we need more, like Lemon, gone.

I'm glad you were onto Kanye so far back. His bipolarity is riding him. Even Elon had to ban him again.

Indiana Jones will truly suck. The Left has killed Star Wars, Marvel and Disney. They killed the James Bond franchise. I'm surprised they haven't both race- and gender-swapped Indy. Will they have him toss his whip away like Luke Skywalker does his light saber? Dial M for Metamucil is hilarious. A takeoff on Dial M for Murder or Dial H for Hero?

I have to hit the tip jar for this column.

Merry Christmas.

Expand full comment

"Dial M for Metamucil is hilarious"

That was really good. I don't even know how to work that into a future joke of my own, it's just so stand-alone.

Bravo.

Expand full comment
founding

I saw a great video yesterday commenting that we used to eagerly await seeing our favorite stories become motion pictures. Now when we see the trailers we just cringe and say, "Please, no."

Expand full comment

Yeah. I liked Lord of the Rings. I discovered the books while confined to an Air Force hospital bed in Colorado. I had read everything else in the small hospital library (a nice lady brought books around in a cart. She quickly just began leaving 10 or so at a time with me) and that was all that was left, so I sighed and dug in. Fell in love, of course.

I was dreading the movies (it really needed the "Scouring of the Shire, I still think) but found it more than acceptable. I got the extended Director's cut or whatever, and like that even more. Not perfect, but a very good job.

Took my kids to see Star Wars on the opening weekend. Too bad what they did to it.

Expand full comment

I know the last movie would have been too long but The Scouring of the Shire is important in that it's how the Hobbitonites found out that Frodo and his Posse didn't just go bar hopping for a year.

They came back legit. It's why Sam ended up as mayor, I suspect.

Expand full comment

1) Wouldn't it be easier to just *jerk* their glued hands loose? Something's going to give there!

2) I hate FJB with the heat of a thousand suns, but I couldn't hear "Frank" in there.

3) It's Christmas. All tips given should be bigger, especially Jim's!

Expand full comment

"1) Wouldn't it be easier to just *jerk* their glued hands loose?" Or how about gluing some other parts of their anatomy in interesting ways? If they want to be glued down, let's help them out!

Expand full comment

This review of the new Indy movie is NSFW. Vulgar and hilarious: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8395JgNJ0sg

Expand full comment

I love Drinker's Razor. It explains a lot.

Expand full comment

I will say this about Kanye: musically, he is a genius. And, like many a genius, he is completely off his rails.

About the "environmental" "protest" - I really didn't see Harry Potter being a chubby chaser. Huh. Who knew?

I will also say this about these low-energy protestors who glue themselves to something to get my attention; why, why, WHY dear sweet merciful jeebus am I no where near when this is going down?

About the Indian Jones trailer: from what I heard out there, they're gonna ret-con the entire Indy history so that Fleabag *is* Indy.

This is my source - https://youtu.be/am2UYowqhu8

Sure, he's a robot who wants to take over earth, but he's an honest robot who wants to take over earth.

Expand full comment

My wife, bless her heart, binged watched "Fleabag" with me in the room. I understood there was some comedy in there, but I couldn't find it. Sorta like that Australian standup nutbag female. To whom is that stuff funny?

Expand full comment
Comment removed
Expand full comment

Hannah Gadsby. I had to look her up. 'They' tried to shove her up my nose. Maybe the word comedy means something different in Australian.

Expand full comment
Comment removed
Expand full comment

*Googles Hannah Gadsby*

*convulses in chair*

That's it, Jorg. You are on The List now.

Expand full comment

As far as "grab-bag" days go, today is some of the grab-baggiest. That's a great thing!

Kanye: said some things some conservatives liked, everything else was bad. Just because a broken clock is right twice a day doesn't mean it's a good clock. Shame on the people who thought Ye was a great endorsement of Trump or something.

Mike Myers: ...yeah, lol

Climate Protesters: The saddest thing about a lot of these people is that their passion does seem genuine. If we didn't live in post-modern times that passion would have been channeled into doing some actual good, like volunteering at a homeless shelter, joining the Peace Corps, or hell if they want to "do something for the environment" there are tons of recycling centers/trash-ridden highways/trees that need planting types of opportunities. These people have been lied to about the "good" they are doing. Add nothing to the world and want to be applauded for it.

Chris Cizzila/Indy: These things seem like they were relevant to the culture some time ago, but not in the present.

Expand full comment

People with time on their hands tend to fashion it into some passion, whether it's Star Trek or feminism, or politics. They need a home team to root for and opposition to fight against. And since "All's fair in love and war" they can fight as dirty as they like.

Just look, in general, not who leads these various crusades but who supplies the muscle. People with time on their hands. Especially if they don't need (or have) an actual job. Musk shed 75% plus of "time-servers" from Twitter and it's still up and running. Those who 'left' obviously had lots of time on their hands to provide muscle for the Cancel Culture, and could feel virtuous about it while getting higjly paid.

Expand full comment

I first became aware of Kanye West when that video of him making an ass of himself at an awards show made the rounds. At that time I couldn't really tell if he was actually crazy/mentally disturbed, or a master showman seriously pushing the boundaries, but I knew I would never be a fan. It was the same for me as with Andy Kaufman. Just because some real geniuses have been a bit crazy doesn't mean every crazy person is a genius.

And I get really tired of having the mentally unbalanced/challenged shoved into my face as if they speak with the voice of God.

Although, come to think of it, that has a long history of cultures that crazy people have been "touched by god" so we should pay attention to them. That's the origin of the Greek word "charisma" and one reason the Oracle at Delphi got paid attention to.

The more things change the more they remain the same, I guess. (I can't remember the Frank phrase for that.)

Expand full comment
Comment removed
Expand full comment

True enough, but while I still appreciate a good fart joke, I was never really a Stooges fan, either. I can understand why many people are, but for me comedy is a lot like pro wrestling: either you like or you don't, without much in-between.

I would never, however, sneer at what someone else finds funny. Humor is as humor hits you, I think.

I also have a hard time enjoy tv comedies that seem to require otherwise intelligent people to be routinely stupid in contrast to their 'normal' behavior. So I liked Cheers but not Frasier. Loved Big Bang Theory, not so much (or at all) Seinfeld.

But if they make others laugh, I'm good with that.

It's like me liking scotch but not bourbon (it always tastes to me like a mouthful of flowers) or beer (many kinds) but not wine (with a few exceptions). Tastes vary, and I'm totally okay with that.

Expand full comment
Comment removed
Expand full comment

I like beer in my beer. I love the German beer purity laws. I am willing to try fruit- or spice-flavored beers, but have yet to find one I really like. I can handle about one raspberry beer then I'm done.

My wife says scotch smells like medicine, and all I can reply is "So?" Bourbon to me, really tastes like aftershave smells. I'd rather pass on your expensive bourbon and let you enjoy it. And the only mixed drink I've ever cared for is a really good original recipe Margarita. I still remember my introduction to it, some 55 years ago.

Oh, and I can sip and enjoy some really good rum.

Slainte!

Expand full comment

I, too, love the Rheinheitsgebot! I used to drink Beck's from Germany. They got bought out by Anheuser-Busch, then Inbev. They stink. Thank God for the Craft Beer Revolution and IPAs. I'm a Dogfish Head 90-minute IPA guy.

Expand full comment

"I'm glad we are mature enough to accept each the other's preferences and tastes without making a judgement of the person"

I don't know, man. Preferring Scotch to Bourbon makes me wonder. Jorg's also the one that got me to Google that Hannah chick/dude.

*eyes Jorg suspiciously*

Expand full comment

No one, least of all me, 'made' you google Hannah OhMyGodsby. That's on you. As an adult jelly donut you should accept the responsibility for your own unwise choices. js

Expand full comment
Comment removed
Expand full comment

Not a fan of flatulence "humor," but the Stooges weren't that; they were slapstick--and funny as heck. Very much a guy thing humor-wise though. Scotch is a rare thing for me. I've made my own wine, so wine AND beer are good. So was Cheers. I binge-watched Frasier well after it went off the air and laughed like hell.

Expand full comment

I just mean that I have a juvenile sense of humor at times, but the Stooges just aren't my thing.

Expand full comment

I put "the more things change the more they stay the same into my English-to-Frank translator and got this:

“plus ça change, plus c'est la même chose“

Expand full comment

That's it. "Things that 'Frank' says."

Expand full comment

"Pardon my Frank?"

Expand full comment

Cillizza is right up there with Ian Milhiser and Jim Acosta for the "Weird and Wrong Journalist" list.

Expand full comment

Re. Biden and the Franks.

I assume Biden is old enough to remember the Franks. And assumed his state dinner was hosting Charlemagne.

Expand full comment
Dec 2, 2022·edited Dec 2, 2022

Holy Roman Emporere [Pi edit: Great Loki, wth is that word??], bitches!

Expand full comment

I still haven't broken in these rented fingers yet. Bear with me.

Expand full comment

Bidet is thinking of Charlegmagne "Tha" God...

Expand full comment
founding

I will give you an extra $5 in cash on top of what I've already paid for subscription and friendship if you stop doing the TGIF thing.

Expand full comment

Nooooo!

Expand full comment
founding

Had the same thought when I saw the photo of the protesters in the hallway.

It was almost as funny as those guys who glued their hands to a Volkswagen floor & then were mad when the lights were turned out on them & they hadn't factored in how they were going to eat & go to the bathroom.

https://www.msn.com/en-us/autos/news/climate-protestors-who-glued-themselves-to-volkswagens-floor-are-left-in-the-dark/ar-AA13be2b

Mental giants, all.

Expand full comment

I hope after the concert was over everyone just turned off the lights and left. Lol. Maybe put them back in the podium

Expand full comment
founding

Wouldn't that have been a hoot!

Expand full comment

How arrogantly presumptuous of Joe Biden to act like he's on a first-name basis with France.

Expand full comment