Those Border Patrol Agents Never Whipped Any Haitian Immigrants, But the Gov't Can't Admit That

"Those people will pay"

Last September, journalists and other Democrats claimed that U.S. Border Agents on horseback were whipping illegal Haitian immigrants in Texas. It was an enormous lie, but the journos didn’t care because they’re not in the business of telling us the truth. Their job is to help Democrats achieve their policy goals. That’s why the journos mostly ignored the border, which has been a huge disaster for the Biden administration, until they could use it to talk about their favorite subject: racism.

Thousands of brown people sweltering under a bridge: BORING
Black people being “whipped” by cowboys on horseback: CLICKBAIT

Whatever happened with that whole thing, anyway? Courtesy of Katie Pavlich at, the Department of Homeland Security has issued an update:

“The Department of Homeland Security (DHS) provides this update regarding the investigation of horse patrol activity in Del Rio, Texas on September 19, 2021. The activity under investigation, which was captured in photographs and video that circulated nationwide, occurred during the large gathering of Haitian and other migrants near the International Bridge… U.S. Customs and Border Protection (CBP) initially referred the investigation to DHS’s Office of Inspector General (OIG).  The OIG declined to investigate and referred the matter back to CBP’s Office of Professional Responsibility (OPR).  OPR then immediately commenced investigative work, including its review of videos and photographs and the interview of witnesses, employees, and CBP leadership. OPR has followed customary process in its investigation of this matter.”

In other words: Nothing has been investigated. That’s because there’s nothing to investigate. It never happened. Here’s what did happen:

That was it. There’s no story here. But they can’t just say that, because it’ll make the bosses look bad. Biden already slandered those border agents, and the bureaucracy can’t just say he was wrong because he’s not a Republican.

So the hot potato gets tossed back and forth between three-letter agencies until everybody forgets about it and moves on. Those Border Patrol agents now exist in a legal limbo, neither guilty nor not guilty, and none of their accusers will ever be held to account for it. Once again, power protects itself.

Your tax dollars at work.

Speaking of your taxes, which are about to go up:

Hey, why is the presidential seal blurred out? I don’t have a conspiracy theory here. I honestly don’t know why they would do this. That’s why I’m asking.

Also, spending a bunch of money we don’t have on stuff that won’t work is bad. But that’s all Democrats know how to do. That, and lying about it.

Here’s a dumb person saying something dumb, for money:

“White folks have emotions.” What a stunning insight, Joy Reid.

It’s bad to be openly racist, unless you’re openly racist against white people. That’s fine. Hell, in 2021 it’s required.

And of course, it’s racist to point out that a black person is a racist. It’s racist to criticize a black person for any reason, unless the black person is a Republican. (Sorry, Winsome Sears!)

For example, this is obviously racist:

Biden picked Kamala Harris to be his VP because she’s a woman of color. That was the only reason, obviously, or else her 2020 campaign wouldn’t have flamed out before Iowa. Kamala is incompetent and creepy and weird, and now it’s everybody else’s fault for noticing. Remember the 11th Commandment: Thou shalt not hold thy diversity hire to account.

In all fairness, though, Biden isn’t the president who chose the worst VP ever. That honor goes to Barack Obama.

Sophia Urista,1 the rock singer who peed on a fan’s face onstage at a festival in Daytona Beach last week, is now apologizing:

A post shared by Sophia Urista (@sophiaurista)

It’s always disappointing to see a true artist forced to grovel for forgiveness by smaller minds, but I can understand why she finally gave in. It’s never easy when urine the news for all the wrong reasons.

Hang in there, Sophia. In my heart, you’ll always be #1!

Did you want some more Spider-Man? Well, here’s some more Spider-Man.

I clapped! I clapped when I saw it!

‘Member Doc Ock?2 ‘Member Electro? ‘Member Person Made of CGI Sand? ‘Member when Marvel sold the Spider-Man film rights to Sony when Tom Holland was still a toddler, but then Marvel started making their own movies that earned lots and lots of money, so now we have this mishmash?

But it all makes sense, because Marvel has a multiverse now and all the characters from all the other Spider-Man movies can be in Marvel Cinematic Universe movies. Let’s hear it for all the lawyers who made this moment possible.3

We’ve now reached the saturation point with this shared universe, just like the shared universe in Marvel comics. There’s just too much of it and I start to lose interest. If everything is the end of the world, then nothing is. More is not necessarily better.

I thought maybe Shang-Chi would be different, but in the space of two hours it devolved from interesting character development and cool, inventive kung fu sequences into another huge, murky CGI battle just like all the other Marvel movies. And now every Spider-Man villain we’ve ever seen in a movie is going to fight him all at once. Okay. Shrug emoji.

And keep in mind, I’m a huge dork! It’s not like I’m Martin Scorsese or Ridley Scott, looking down my nose at grown adults running around in colorful tights. I love that stuff. In moderation.

Hey, it could be worse. Mel Gibson could be making another Lethal Weapon movie, about 20 years too late. I’m glad that’ll never…


I gave the first episode of Mayor of Kingstown a try because it’s a Taylor Sheridan show, and Jeremy Renner was really good in Wind River. But as I watched it, I kept wondering if they broadcast the second episode by mistake. I had no idea who any of the characters were, what they were doing, why they were doing it, or why I should care.

Usually I don’t mind being dropped into a story in media res, but this just felt like Sheridan was daring me to keep watching it. Various violent crimes are depicted, and there’s plenty of oblique dialogue filled with F-bombs, and there’s even some nudity, and it’s all very dull. You can be bleak, and you can be confusing, but both at the same time? Meh.

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Or as I like to call her, Urethra Franklin.


Parker scoffs at “Otto Octavius,” but his mentor is literally called “Doctor Strange.” His previous mentor was “Iron Man.” He helped save the universe from someone named “Thanos.” He himself is known as “Spider-Man.” You’d think the kid would be accustomed to silly names by now.


I doubt Marvel will lose the Spider-Man rights to the Steve Ditko estate. But wouldn’t that be something? The dirty little secret of comics is that all these brave, justice-seeking superheroes were stolen from their creators by greedy corporations. It would be nice to see Ditko… avenged.