Stacey Abrams Proves Losing Is the New Winning
None of the responsibility, all of the fun
Just imagine how miserable Stacey Abrams would be right now if she had actually won the 2018 Georgia gubernatorial race. By now, she’d be just another failed governor who couldn’t keep her ridiculous promises. Her potential would’ve been squandered. Instead, her political ambitions remain unrealized, but she has the consolation of being rich and famous.
Abrams really has the best of both worlds these days. She bears none of the responsibility of elected office, yet she gets to bask in the glory of all the things she would’ve done if those dirty Republicans hadn’t stolen the election from her. She even gets to be on Star Trek. It’s a pretty sweet deal.
But she still has her critics. Witness the rampant racism and sexism in the United States of America. Jeff Amy, Associated Press:
When Democrat Stacey Abrams first ran for Georgia governor in 2018, her lackluster personal finances and a hefty bill from the IRS gave Republicans fodder to question how she could manage a state budget when she struggled with her own debts.
As she launches a second bid this year, that’s no longer an issue.
Abrams now says she’s worth $3.17 million, according to state disclosures filed in March. That’s compared with a net worth of $109,000 when she first ran four years ago.
Abrams is worth literally 30 times more than she was four years ago. Losing is the new winning!
I applaud Stacey Abrams’ newfound fame and financial success, especially if the alternative would’ve been to put her in elected office. If a bunch of dimwits want to cheer her on because she lost, that’s none of my concern.
Now I look forward to Abrams painting herself as a victim yet again. Sure, she’s a millionaire who is worshipped by libs wherever she goes, but some people still oppose her. What’s up with that? Can’t a black woman lose an election in America without somebody making fun of her for whining about it?
Let’s hope she loses again so she can really get rich. You go, girl!
Oh, Joe Biden is doing just fine. Why do you ask?
“Come on, man. It’s my turn!”
Incidentally, remember when Obama got COVID-19? It was just three weeks ago. Yet there he is, shaking hands in a crowded room.
Don’t let anybody tell you to wear a mask. Our betters sure aren’t.
Can you blame her, though? A mask would stop her from eating.
Meanwhile:
There’s still DEADLY GERM DANGER when our betters find it convenient, but the danger magically disappears when it’s inconvenient. This is now Schrödinger’s Pandemic.
I remain skeptical that Elon Musk is going to do anything to change how Twitter operates, now that he’s a 9.2% stakeholder in the company. But at least he’s pissing off a lot of people whose dismay I sincerely enjoy:
Mother Jones calls Musk an “irresponsible” Twitter user because of his history of “inciting harassment, spreading misinformation, and trolling lawmakers with extremely immature digs.” They sure don’t want anybody to have any fun.
What’s the point of being a billionaire if you let a bunch of humorless scolds tell you how to live your life? That’s why it’s called “F*** you” money.
Here’s somebody else who thinks he knows how to spend Musk’s dough better than Musk does:
Yes, indeed, every boy’s dream is to grow up and replace every lead pipe in America. Who needs fast cars and rocket ships anyway?
Libs hate greed. That’s why they want all your money.
If the sour moralizing of “Ken Tremendous” seems familiar, that’s because he’s actually Michael Schur, creator of such finger-wagging TV fare as Parks and Recreation and The Good Place. Schur is very aware of everyone’s sins but his own: pride.
Alright, I’m now officially marking out1 about this movie:
The early reviews of Everything Everywhere All at Once have been utterly rapturous, and I’ve loved Michelle Yeoh ever since she upstaged Jackie Chan in Supercop 30 years ago. Wait… 30 years ago? Yeah, I guess it takes decades of practice to make it look like you have no idea what you’re doing in a fight scene.
And yes, that’s Ke Huy Quan, AKA Short Round from Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom. This might be the best child-actor comeback since Jackie Earl Haley played Rorschach in Watchmen. No matter how old you get, never let anybody tell you it’s over.
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Wrestling lingo. Google it.
I will always be grateful to Joe Biden for the look on Stacey Abrams' face when, on live TV, Biden did NOT name her his VP choice--as she so clearly expected. Priceless.
A lot of politicians probably watch the Eddie Murphy comedy, "The Distinguished Gentleman" as a how-to documentary rather than a satirical comedy (scammer decides that the real money is by becoming a scamming Congressman). But Stacey Abrams as found a way to scam the system by not even winning the election. While losing has certainly helped go from in the red to "in the black" (is that racist?), everyone knows that the real money is in winning, which is probably why she's running again. I mean, look at Obama and how much dough he's raking in post-presidency. I LOVE the images of Biden looking jealous while being overshadowed by Obama. It's like when the high school football quarterback who went to the state finals comes back to Homecoming, and the current team is 0-10. Third, love the praise for Michelle Yeoh – she is amazing and was a great part of both Shang-Chi and the Mandalorian episode where she fought with Asoka. Will probably leave my bunker to go see that movie at some point...