Libs Pretend Not to Know How Fire Exits Work
Or maybe they're just dumb
Ever since a psycho killed a bunch of kids in Texas last week, the libs have been trotting out all the same old failed gun-control arguments. They want to punish law-abiding Americans for something we didn’t do.
The Uvalde school shooter was able to get into that school because somebody inside had propped open a fire door. Republicans are now calling for schools to make it tougher for criminals to get inside. So the libs are pretending they don’t know how fire exits work.
Here are a couple of examples from former comedians Stephen Colbert and Jimmy Kimmel:
What are they talking about? Haven’t these guys ever seen a fire exit? The buildings they work in all have doors that can only be opened from the inside. Duh.
Newsbusters has catalogued all the late night hosts confused by the concept of doors. If their arguments for gun control are so solid, why do they need to pretend to be such morons?
Or maybe they’re not pretending.
Libs will never get what they want — confiscation of every privately owned firearm in America — so they imagine they’re fighting some noble battle and their opponents are bloodthirsty demons. If that means pretending not to know what a fire exit is, they’ll do that. They’d rather look like imbeciles than concede a point to a hated enemy.
Speaking of imbeciles: Oh, Joe Biden is doing just fine. Why do you ask?
Wait. Did he actually say that?
Yep. He actually said that.
Biden also trotted out his ridiculous line that Americans couldn’t buy cannons when the Second Amendment was passed, which would be irrelevant even if it were true. He gets corrected every time he utters this lie, but it doesn’t matter. He didn’t care about the truth even when he still had all his marbles.
All the same gun-control crap is getting trotted out yet again:
“Meaningful.”
“Progress.”
“Journalism.”
Biden could’ve been a great president if stuff just stopped happening:
I’ll bet you didn’t know Biden is the first president in history to ever deal with a crisis, let alone multiple crises of his own making. What would we do without presidential historians?
And isn’t it weird that CNN+ collapsed after just a few weeks? Who wouldn’t want to pay extra for this sort of fearless journalism?
Remember Nina Jankowicz, the would-be “disinformation czar”? All that stuff happened over a week ago, so you might’ve forgotten. Since she resigned from her ridiculous job, she’s been showing us how she would’ve run things if she’d stayed:
I’m pro-choice when it comes to blocking people on social media, so that’s fine. But I do wonder how someone like this thought she was going to decide for the rest of us what is and isn’t true.
Best of luck, Nina. That contributor spot at CNN or MSNBC can’t be far away.
Why is Disney erasing the accomplishments of Billy Dee Williams?
Lando Calrissian has been the coolest guy in the universe since 1980. Before the intern who runs the Star Wars Twitter account was born.
This is just a way for Disney to undercut any criticism of the latest underwhelming Star Wars product. If you don’t like their shows, you’re a racist.
Don’t forget, Disney is the company that took John Boyega off the posters for The Force Awakens to appease the Chinese Communist Party:
I won’t be scolded by these hypocrites.
Have you ever come home from work and can’t even remember what you did all day? Well, now there’s a whole show about it.
I decided to check out Severance on Apple+, a month after everybody else watched it, and it’s making me glad I work from home.
Or… do I? Maybe I just don’t remember anything that happens at my real job!
One of my first jobs out of college was data entry, sitting in a big room with a bunch of other people all staring at screens all day. If I’d been given the option to forget my work day the second I left the office, I probably would’ve taken it. And I probably would’ve gone even crazier than I did at that place.
So I’m digging the show. It’s a very odd tone for a Ben Stiller project, more dramatic than comedic, but it works. I’ve been a Stiller fan ever since his old FOX show 30 years ago, which also launched Bob Odenkirk1 and a couple of other people whose names I can’t recall at the moment. So it’s cool to see Stiller branching out.
Somewhere in a box of stuff, I’ve got a copy of the unreleased Heat Vision & Jack pilot Stiller directed in the ‘90s. It starred Jack Black as an astronaut who turned into the smartest man in the world whenever the sun came up, and Owen Wilson as the voice of his talking motorcycle. It was very silly and hilarious.
I could dig up that bootleg copy. Or I could just watch it on YouTube!
Sometimes the future is okay.
How is it almost June already? What the hell happened?
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I’m currently reading Bob Odenkirk’s memoir, Comedy Comedy Comedy Drama, and I’m up to the part where he’s been performing with David Cross for a while and they’re brainstorming ideas for a TV sketch show…
Hardly any door propped open will lead to a gunman entering the building. Possible but statistically unlikely.
Hardly any trans person will end up letting their self-delusion lead them to violence. Possible but statistically unlikely.
Hardly any gun owner will end up using it in a crime. Possible but statistically unlikely.
Pretty much every person who's every posted a bag of dead cats on their social media page have turned out to be sociopaths. It is statistically impossible for it to be otherwise.
Scary Poppins blocking you is a kind of badge of honor. But in principle I don't think you should have "apartheid" in the town square. She should be able to block hearing your commentary but should not be able to block you hearing what she as an (almost) public official is saying. Politicians shouldn't be able to block the public from hearing what they are saying, even if they choose to ignore the moaning masses of peasants they supposedly serve.