Biden Caught a Cold That Made Him 1,000 Years Old
His real opponent is Father Time
I watched a little bit of the debate last night, just to see if the two oldest human beings to ever run for president of the United States could both walk out to the podium without incident. Biden hadn’t been seen in a week, after all. He’d been squirreled away at Camp David, supposedly doing a Rocky montage to pump himself up for the big night.
This was the first presidential debate that also served as proof of life.
After about 15 minutes, I’d seen enough. I can’t stand to listen to either of them for more than that, but at least Trump seemed like he still knew where and who he was. He’s old, but he’s not Biden old.
Yet.
Even with the sound off, the optics were horrible: Trump gesticulating and yammering about whatever, and Biden just staring at him like a slack-jawed zombie.
And when Joe had to talk… oh boy…
Look, I never said Trump wasn’t funny.
Online, the journos and other Democrats were hanging in there, trying to make excuses for Biden’s excruciating debate performance. Before it was even over, they started reporting the “breaking news” that oh, by the way, Joe has a cold.
No, he has 81 years behind him. He cannot speak in public anymore unless everything is written down for him, and he can barely even manage that.
Every day you get older. Now, that’s a law.
But the journos’ sad attempt at gaslighting didn’t last long. The dam of media denial had finally burst. The NYT started completely freaking out:
The lies won’t work anymore. Biden’s dementia isn’t a “cheap fake.” It’s not “misinformation.” Last night the sad truth was plain to see, live on national television.
Now our moral, ethical, and intellectual betters in the press have no choice but to say the same thing the Republicans have been saying for four years, without ever admitting that their bitterest enemies were right.
If the Dems have any sense at all, this is their big chance to send the old coot out on an ice floe. Cut him loose. They’ve taken this elder abuse as far as it can go. Either they do something about it now, and I mean today, or they’re screwed in November.
It doesn’t matter how much you hate Trump. He’s not your opponent here. You can’t beat Father Time.
“Hey, five months is a long time in politics.” Yeah, and it only goes one way. What Joe Biden showed you last night is as good as he’s gonna get for the rest of his life.
All Trump has to do in the meantime is shut up and not die. There’s no chance of the former, but the latter is still possible.
I’ll never vote for any Democrat, but a lot of people look at Kamala or Newsom or even Michelle Obama and say, “Well, at least they’re under 100.”
Hell, even Hillary might have another shot now. We’re in uncharted territory here.
SPOILERS FOR 3 BODY PROBLEM AHEAD
I finally got around to watching this alien invasion show, which I’d been avoiding because most Netflix shows are cheap, stupid garbage. But it’s amazingly good, and I might type a bunch more words about it once I’ve gathered my thoughts.
Here’s one of my favorite moments in the series, and also one of the quietest. It’s the key to the whole story, and to life in 2024.
A character named Mike Evans (played by the great Jonathan Pryce) has been communicating with incomprehensibly advanced aliens who are on their way to Earth, and he reveres them as gods. As a way to help them understand humans, he’s been reading them our fairy tales.1
And with one little slip of the tongue, he dooms us all:
Whoops! That’s the moment when the intergalactic explorers become an invasion force.
It’s also the moment when I started rooting for the aliens.
I’m with them, man! I am sick to death of being lied to. Every damn day. About everything.
Politicians. “Journalists.” Clergy. Actors. Advertisers. Doctors. Even most comedians. They all know how easy it is to just make $#!+ up to get what they want. To get out of trouble. Hell, simply to anger their enemies as a form of entertainment, AKA owning the libs/cons/whoever.
Lying has become so ingrained into American culture, it’s second nature. At this point, I just naturally assume that every punch bowl is at least 50% turds.
If I were an alien civilization that had somehow developed intergalactic travel and communications, without ever developing the ability to say something I know not to be true, I would hate and fear humans too.
Please come save me, ET!
TGIF (Teaching George’s Iguana Foosball), and thanks for reading. If you enjoy my writing, please help me pay my bills with it.
If you’ve watched the show, you might be wondering why the alien San-Ti need to listen to an old man reading from a book of fairy tales, when they have seemingly infinite computing power and instant access to every scrap of human knowledge on earth. They should already know who Little Red Riding Hood is, right?
Well, that’s simple: It’s just a show. You should really just relax.
After all the fuss over releasing the recording of Special Counsel Hur's interview with Joe Bidem it was awfully sporting of the President to do a live re-enactment of it on Thursday night.
The bar was set very, very low for both of these guys but Trump clearly won and dialed it back for the first time. He let Biden implode for the most part. And to think all this talk about Biden taking "super juice"and would whip his weight in wild cats in a debate was all demented over thinking.
The dems are stuck with Biden. They can't swap him out for anything that will help them win in November. Trump is a clown but I will take that over the democratic clown show we have seen the last 4 years. To paraphrase Lincoln "A live dog is better than a dead lion or an old and toothless one"