Peppermint Psaki Says Biden Wants to "Make Fundamental Change In Our Economy"

You can fundamentally change anything with a can of gasoline and a match

Ronald Reagan once said that the nine most terrifying words in the English language are, “I’m from the government and I’m here to help.” Now the Biden administration has given us a 10-word sentence that might be even scarier.

“The president wants to make fundamental change in our economy?1 And he feels coming out of the pandemic? Is exactly the time to do that. And if we don’t do it now? If we don’t address the cost of child care… if we don’t address the climate crisis, if we don’t ensure that universal pre-K is a reality now? We’re not gonna have the same opportunity to do it for some time.”

Good! Please, please, please let this crisis go to waste.

It’s a lot quicker and easier to “fundamentally change” something than it was to build it in the first place. For example, you can “fundamentally change” your house by dousing the whole place in gasoline and lighting a match. Are you better off than you were before you fundamentally changed it?

If you’ve been conscious for the past 18 months and you still believe the government makes anything better, then you’re the audience for Psaki’s nonsense. The rest of us aren’t impressed.

The Biden administration is trying to use Obama-era rhetoric to paper over their many, many failures, but here’s the problem: For whatever reason, people actually liked Obama. Biden has been in office for just 8 months and everybody hates him already. He won’t be able to “Hope and Change” himself out of this mess, or any of his other messes.

In other news, it turns out the Biden administration can’t trust the Taliban after all. This is a shock to anyone with an IQ below room temperature.

By the way, Hunter Biden is completely corrupt and so is his dad.

Oh, and the border is still a disaster and it’s only getting worse.

The latest edition of Stephen “Not the Trump Guy” Miller’s podcast is devoted to dismantling the lies of CNN’s Brian Stelter. Long story short: Stelter dismisses “right-wing media” for not doing any original reporting, because he just ignores all the original reporting they do. Stelter’s dishonest pontificating is insufferable, but Miller suffers it so you don’t have to.

Stelter also claims there’s no “New York Times of the right,” which implies the New York Times is an organ of the left. I’m sure Stelter didn’t mean to admit that, because it’s the truth.

A lot of people call Stelter a potato, but that isn’t really fair because potatoes are popular. That fact-raping dullard barely hits 90K in the demo.

This story seems too crazy to be true. It’s true.

That guy should sue the school system into oblivion.

I don’t know what’s going on with Maxine Waters, but I like it.

Twitter claims there are no signs that Rep. Waters’ account was hacked, let alone erased. Which is exactly what you’d expect them to say, isn’t it?

Waters should consult with Anthony Weiner. We all remember when that hacker completely destroyed his life.

North Korea is a terrifying nightmare state and an ongoing crime against humanity, but them fellers sure can put on a show.

“It took him two strikes to break the blocks. Have his family disemboweled.”

Guess who’s back? Back again?

Reminds me of an old song: “You better look out because I’m gonna say f***!”

Trick or treat! Smell my feet! Halloween is obsolete!

Here’s how this evil school announced the child-hating news:

“As a school with foundational beliefs around equity for our students and families, we are moving away from our traditional ‘Pumpkin Parade’ event and requesting that students do not come to school in costumes… Halloween events create a situation where some students must be excluded for their beliefs, financial status, or life experience… Some students experience over stimulation, while others must deal with complex feelings of exclusion. It’s uncomfortable and upsetting for kids.”

Yeah, we need to protect the kids by stopping them from dressing up as Captain America and eating candy. What a harrowing ordeal for them.

Liberals are awful human beings. These people shouldn’t be allowed within 100 yards of a child, let alone trusted with teaching them. This is the sort of crap that makes kids grow up to become Michael Myers.

Back in the old days, I used to worry about getting killed by a virus that leaked from a Chinese lab. Now I’m worried about getting killed by a gun-mounted robotic dog for walking into my local Kroger without a mask.

Black Mirror wasn’t supposed to be an instructional manual. Well, at least I’ll see my death coming. Maybe I can distract it with a stainless-steel chew toy.

William Shatner’s space flight went off without a hitch, after being briefly delayed while he scanned the script to make sure nobody else got more lines.2


BODY once told me the band was gonna fold, see🎶

It’s nice that we’re starting to get new movies and TV shows again, but it seems like everything is a reboot or a retread or some other regurgitation of stuff we’ve seen a dozen times before. Halloween, Scream, Child’s Play, Day of the Dead, I Know What You Did Last Summer, Spider-Man: At Least It’s Not Black Widow… I’m nostalgic for the 20th Century too, but can’t these guys come up with a new idea? The entertainment industry used to be about telling stories, and now it’s about managing IPs.

This might be the bottom of the barrel:

I’m a bit too “mature” to have any fond memories of the original Home Alone, but it looks like these guys just took the script and changed a few names. And now it’s set in England? Whatever.

On the other hand, I’m kinda looking forward to Rob Delaney getting his ass kicked by a child for 90 minutes. He hasn’t taken this much punishment since that set on Kimmel:

But if you’re looking for Kevin McAllister to pop up in the new Home Alone and give you a dose of memberberries, no such luck:

Oh well.

I just realized who this new kid looks like: Herbie Popnecker. (Google him.)

Happy Wednesday! If you enjoyed what you just read, please subscribe to this newsletter so I can afford to keep writing it for you.


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As long as Psaki insists on using the irritating uptalk that makes everything sound like a question? I will continue to transcribe it accordingly?


The late Harlan Ellison claimed that Shatner didn’t like his script for “The City on the Edge of Forever” because it gave Leonard Nimoy more lines. I don’t know if that’s true, but at least it’s funny.