43 Comments

I imagine if I had to read the news everyday it might help to drink some before I did it.

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I can confirm.

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"Can’t a U.S. president pay for his son’s hookers and cocaine without everybody getting all up in his business?"

So say we all.

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"How is the Biden administration going to handle the 1 year anniversary of the fall of Afghanistan"? Is that a real question the media are asking. Well, they're going to bake them a cake of course! "If only Biden could send more arms and material!" is probably what they're thinking. Who knows.

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They can't possibly be thinking of reminding anyone about it.

Jim keeps a ticker and it kills me that it got to, like, 19 without some earth-shattering KABOOM.

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How did she go for 20 minutes and nobody noticed? Oh, right. Nobody was watching it.

Also, had the producer tied one on as well?

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You can't drink all day if you don't start drinking in the morning, I always say!

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Make sure no one in the government does anything stupid? About 18 months too late for that...

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But there's still plenty moar stupid they can do.

Don't underestimate Joe's abilities and stuff.

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"Are we not doing “Latinx” anymore?"

Mi mujer, Spanish for my woman/wife, is from El Salvador, just celebrated 30 years a US citiizen, has NEVER done Latinx.

I suggest from here on out it be pronounced "La-Tinks."

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Good for you, 30 years together!

Dems hate ALL Romance languages!!!

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Jul 12, 2022·edited Jul 12, 2022

iDonde esta el diablo pollo!

And we've only been together for 6 of them so far but she doesn't need me. Luckily I've convinced her that we should be Buddies For Life.

She's the catch. She's the one really living the 'Murican Dream. Better than most 'Muricans.

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Wait. "Where is the devil chicken"?! A Dios, mon amigo.

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Jul 12, 2022·edited Jul 12, 2022

Not just "chicken" per se. It's worse than that...

See, rooster = gallo. And hen = galla. Like the actual bird animal.

Pollo specifically refers to the eating part of the chicken.

I didn't know the first time I said it that it was even dumber than I'd intended. 😁

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"We Are Not Tacos"

Ich bin ein Burrito!

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founding

I try to imagine Sleepy Joe standing at the Mexican side of the border wall, yelling "Ich bin ein Burrito!" in a weird, hallucinogenic, dementia-framed attempt to copy JFK.

I. Just. Can't.

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Mix in some Carlos Castaneda and it could work.

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founding

One of the Greatest Literary Hoaxes of my lifetime. Up there with the Hitler Diaries and Howard Hughes wills.

I read "Teachings of Don Juan: A Yaqui Way of Knowledge," back in the early 1970s. Everybody WANTED to believe that chewing cactus root would be the express lane to meaning | enlightenment | finally getting that sweet hippie chick to notice how deep and insightfully sexy you really were.

But I couldn't even commit to tobacco and beer. Not even a good redneck.

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"But I couldn't even commit to tobacco and beer."

I'll do what I can to pick up your slack.

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Jul 12, 2022·edited Jul 12, 2022

"Teachings of Don Juan: A Yaqui Way of Knowledge,"

I took every kind of drug I could think of and I just could never jump onto the roof of a single desert gas station.

Still trying to find the right combination.

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founding

You need to find the right gymnastics coach says, "Way of the Peaceful Warrior."

That and "Be Here Now."

YMMV.

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Jul 12, 2022·edited Jul 12, 2022

I actually like Be Here Now.

*limbers up for headstand against wall*

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Man, Castaneda is half a century ago for me...read him when he came out.

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I was a late-blooming hippie. More like 35 years for me.

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I love the fact that Jill Biden is trending along with "Taco Tuesday" on Twitter.

The James Webb Space Telescope makes you happy you've lived to see something this remarkable!

The lie about the Border Patrol has been just that. Amazingly, no one will cite it among Biden's numerous and greater failures.

You simply must come up with something special for the fall of Afghanistan and the utter debacle of our leaving.

Happy Taco Tuesday.

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Jul 12, 2022·edited Jul 12, 2022

"Happy Taco Tuesday."

Perhaps in perfect illustration of Dr. Jill's generalizations and allusions, one of my greatest disappointments in living in a Latino household (wife, stepson, MIL) was that they didn't eat tacos.

So one Tuesday there was a "Pi's turn to cook" declaration. There was ground beast and tortillas and chz and crema and all manner of salsas. Put 15 year-old stepson to work grating and slicing and we had the first ever Casa de Pi Taco Tuesday. He was all in after that.

Leaving work early tonight to poach and pull the chicken for tonight - we don't always do Tacos del Gringo, as my brother-in-law calls them.

The MIL got into the spirit one time and essentially made Shrimp Scampi one Tuesday when I was running late - Italian meets Latino. It was divine. Chicken tenders, frozen Captain Gordon's fish patties cut into pieces, or a Bavette hot off the grill sliced thin all serve well. Add an improvised sauce or seasoning and you're off. Nom Nom.

#FollowMeForMasRecipes

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founding

Mas, por favor!!

After a few years grits pale.

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Ah, corn. Salvadorans call themselves "Hombres de Maiz" - Men of Corn. They dig it all kinds of ways.

I'm a fan, too. I prefer corn tortillas to flour or rice. Corn on the cob is an awesome summer treat. Bourbon. Mmmm... Bourbon.

And Grits. Any self respecting southerner knows grits can be heavenly. I made the mistake of saying to my local host, "Yeah - grits are kinda like Cream of Wheat." You'd've thought I'd said "Could you please pass the Jelly?" out loud. Butterery... Bacony... smooth as velvet, sweet, oh so sweet... To see it there with an egg on top with a side of scrapple... I was wrong about the Cream of Wheat thing.

I had the epiphany at this guy's old place in Rock Hill, SC. Now he's killing it at this new joint, among a bunch of others he and his wife run.

https://bayhavenrestaurantgroup.com/

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Followed. I poach and pull chicken in the crockpot for the less effort of it all. Mmm fish tacos added to the menu. Youngest kid helped me make them last time and she was surprised how easy they were. "Most of your recipes don't take that much work! Your reputation is crumbling, it's a scam!" To which I replied, "No child I just outsource the sous chef-ing to other people - that's the key!"

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Outsourcing the Sous Chef-ing is a solid way to spend time together.

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That Biden bunch say the wackiest things, eh?

I'm old enough to remember when Joe was known as "the smallest brain in the senate." I think Hugh Hewitt used that phrase around 2000.

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Jill Biden never watched Hill Street Blues.

[At the luncheon honoring him as "Hispanic Officer of the Year," Ray Calletano is introduced as a "Puerto Rican-American."]

RAY: Chief Daniels, my esteemed colleagues, it is with great pride that I accept and thank you for this award. At a time like this, I feel that there is only one thing that I can say: Why huevos rancheros? And why margaritas? Why do you assume that all Hispanic people like that kind of food? I don't like that kind of food. I'm not Mexican. I'm not even Puerto Rican. You go to all this trouble to give this banquet in my honor, and no one even bothers to find out that I'm COLOMBIAN, not Mexican or Puerto Rican. And furthermore, phrases like "credit to his people" and "fine Puerto Rican-American" tend to stick in the throat of a man who has been a citizen of this country for twenty-two years. And why is it that when you are all here today to honor me as Hispanic Officer of the Year, I look around a room full of ranking officers and the only other Hispanics I see are waiters and busboys? As far as I am concerned, you can keep your award!

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Soooo... empanada?

Or how about we just stop with all this Hyphenated-American BS.

Just be American. You're allowed to choose to be an American.

Choose wisely.

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author

I always think of that scene when somebody complains about "white people." Okay, which kind?

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Amazing that they were warned about Latino diversity FORTY YEARS AGO and learned nothing.

As for white people, now "folks" on Twitter are claiming Anne Frank had white privilege. ANNE. F'KING. FRANK.

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So we now know that Joe Biden didn't get dementia from old age, he caught it from his wife.

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“pictures that appear to show a Border Patrol agent on horseback with a whip”

Is this like when bad guys "shoot people" but police officers have weapons that have "discharged?"

The Drew Holden Twitter thread is complete with all of the, as our host would say, Caca del Toro that should rightly appear next to the definition of _Gaslighting_ in the dictionary.

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Wow. Like it. Like it a lot.

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founding

Sorry to be so late to the party, but that's the library biz....people are always asking questions, sometimes all afternoon.

I think that DOCTOR Jill's speechwriter actually meant to reference breakfast BURRITOS. S/he probably doesn't know that tacos and burritos are completely different items, libtards not being very knowledgeable about the culture of any of the ethnicities they patronize. Anyway.

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