Week Sauce (7/5)
Weekend immune system
Welcome to Week Sauce, where I share some jokes I wrote about the past week’s events. Enjoy!
A British man says he was scammed out of £200 by an A.I.-generated Jennifer Aniston that said it loved him.
What an idiot. She’s actually in love with me!
Richard Gere has traveled to India to celebrate the Dalai Lama’s 90th birthday.
The actor credits His Holiness for helping him achieve inner peace by pulling out that pesky gerbil.
A man carrying 16 live snakes on a flight from Thailand has been arrested in India.
The charge? Not enough snakes.
For the second year in a row, Chick-fil-A is America’s favorite fast-food chain.
The least favorite? Pigeon-fil-A.
Jurors in the sex-trafficking trial of Sean “Diddy” Combs have begun deliberating.
The jury room has been stocked with coffee, light snacks, and other refreshments.
Punk band Bob Vylan has been dropped from music festivals across Europe after chanting “Death, death to the IDF.”
They should look on the bright side: At least they don’t have beepers.
The British punk band Bob Vylan now insist they’re not in favor of killing Jews.
However, they do hate music.
United Talent Agency has dropped the British punk band Bob Vylan after they chanted “Death, death to the IDF” onstage.
The band’s phones are blowing up, but not literally. Yet.
The Reverend Jimmy Swaggart, who was caught on camera with a prostitute in the late ‘80s, has passed away.
He’s currently having a very tense conversation with St. Peter.