Week Sauce (6/28)
Weekend immune system
Welcome to Week Sauce, where I share some jokes I wrote about the past week’s events. Enjoy!
Congratulations to Zohran Mamdami, the Democratic Party candidate for mayor of New York City.
Some local businesses are already seeing a big boost.
Well, it was a long time coming, but one of America’s greatest enemies has finally been vanquished.
Better luck next time, Indiana Pacers!
The Ayatollah Khamenei has declared victory over the United States and Israel.
He also congratulated the Indiana Pacers on their big win.
Later this year, Dolly Parton will play Las Vegas for the first time in over 30 years.
Why settle for one Sphere when you can have two?
Hunter Biden is getting sued by his own lawyers for $50,000 in unpaid legal bills.
In his defense, he needs that money to buy drugs.
Fred Smith, the founder of Federal Express, has passed away at the age of 80.
Nobody is exactly sure when the funeral is, because his coffin is being shipped FedEx Ground.
Archaeologists at an ancient Roman fort in England have dug up two shoes believed to be almost 2,000 years old.
However, they could only find one sock.
Johnny Knoxville will host a reboot of the gross-out reality show Fear Factor.
It’ll be just like the old version, but with much more Johnny Knoxville getting kicked in the balls.
Researchers say just one dose of magic mushrooms could relieve depression for over five years.
Unfortunately, the prison term is seven years.
Pedro Pascal says he called J.K. Rowling a “heinous loser” because “bullies make me f***ing sick.”
He then stole Rowling’s lunch money and shoved her into a locker.
According to a new documentary on Barbara Walters, Clint Eastwood asked her out on a date but she turned him down.
I didn’t even know either of them was legally blind.
Mexican President Claudia Sheinbaum says her country is “no one’s pinata.”
She’s right. When it comes to illegal drugs and aliens, you just can’t beat Mexico!
If even one of those jokes made you smile a little, please subscribe!