Week Sauce (3/23)

Weekend immune system

According to seismologists, Taylor Swift fans caused a small earthquake at one of her LA concerts last year.
Now am I allowed to call them fat?

Mackenzie Scott, ex-wife of Jeff Bezos, is giving away yet another $640 million of her divorce settlement.
And to really stick it to him, not one penny is going toward baldness research.

The first trailer for the Beetlejuice sequel has finally arrived, and Alec Baldwin’s character is nowhere to be seen.
Which is weird, considering how good he is at turning people into ghosts.

RFK Jr. is expected to pick attorney Nicole Shanahan as his running mate.
Watch yourself, Nicole. Bad things can happen when you go for a ride with a Kennedy. (Too soon?)

According to Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, RICO is not a crime. 
Finally, she admits it’s not illegal to be rich! That’s a Spanish joke.

Once again, the Washington Post is claiming Joe Biden doesn’t have dementia, but rather a stutter.
Which is really f-fuh... fuh-fuh-fuh... really darn dishonest.

Biden has been wearing a new pair of “lifestyle sneakers” to keep him from falling down so much.
I dunno, I think they look pretty cool.

Pornhub has disabled access in Texas because of a new state law intended to protect minors.
Good. They shouldn’t be looking at dirty movies after spending all day digging underground.