It’s been a while since we’ve had a heartwarming, life-affirming, feel-good news story, so I’m going to savor this one: Jussie Smollett is finally in jail.
A judge sentenced Jussie Smollett to 150 days in jail Thursday, branding the Black and gay actor a narcissistic charlatan for staging a hate crime against himself to grab the limelight while the nation struggled with wrenching issues of racial injustice. Smollett responded by defiantly maintaining his innocence and suggesting he could be killed in jail.
Yes, he really did that:
Smollett seems to think someone will try to kill him in jail. But… why? Who wants him out of the way? Is he being targeted by other hate-crime hoaxers who are mad he ruined the game for everybody?
Does he have information that will lead to the arrest of Hillary Clinton?
Now that Jussie is in the joint, I find myself nostalgic for the days when our moral, ethical, and intellectual betters believed his ridiculous story because it confirmed their biases. He even fooled self-described journalists:
And Jussie even snowed the current president and vice president of the United States:
None of the people who defended Jussie will ever suffer any consequences for their complicity in his race-baiting hoax. None of the people who called you a racist for doubting him will apologize. That’s not how this game works. And that’s why it’s particularly satisfying to see him in jail right now.
If laughing at this ridiculous hoaxer makes me a racist, at least I’m in good company:
Let’s close things out with the leading expert on Jussie Smollett:
Aaahh indeed, Jussie. Aaahh indeed.
Sad news today:
I grew up with Sesame Street, and from an early age I learned that there were people in the world who didn’t look like me. Luis, Gordon, Maria, and the rest. They were nice and kind, and I wanted them to be my friends. I don’t remember the show ever making a big deal out of their race. They were just human beings. I learned that getting along with lots of different kinds of people is just a regular part of life, and Emilio Delgado was one of my teachers. R.I.P.
Disgraced comedian Louis C.K. just put out a bleak, bizarre infomercial for his latest self-released comedy special, Sorry. You had to be watching the Independent Film Channel at 2 in the morning, or maybe you recorded it after you got an email from him about it. But why would you be on his mailing list? Don’t you know what he did?
It’s the best fake infomercial I’ve seen since that one the Beastie Boys made 25 years ago. I laughed several times, which was wrong because he’s a bad person and we don’t like him anymore. Don’t go to [WEBSITE REDACTED] and buy his stand-up specials like I did, or you’re condoning his behavior with women.
Happy 70th birthday to Douglas Adams, who is dead. He passed away in 2001 at the age of 49 while exercising so he could live longer, which was a very Douglas Adams way to go.
Before that, he wrote the best computer game ever. Actually, before that was when he did everything he ever ended up doing.
It’s Friday, and you know what that means: It’s time to BEG FOR MONEY!!!
I’m trying to make a living with this newsletter, friend. I’ve been cranking these things out every weekday at noon sharp, which I plan to do as long as I’m able. And I know you’re enjoying it, or else you wouldn’t still be reading this. So why not do the right thing and subscribe right now?
It’s only $5/month or $50/year. There are 260 working days in 2022, so that comes out to 23 cents a day if you get a monthly subscription, or just 19 cents a day if you go yearly. For just pennies a day, you can keep a has-been blogger from getting a real job. As the worst president in United States history always says: Come on, man!
Here’s yet another reason to financially support people whose work you appreciate, as explained by Stephen “Not the Trump Guy” Miller on his excellent Versus Media podcast: Helping us stay independent means the cancel mobs can’t get us. We can express our honest opinions without worrying about somebody trying to get us fired. You want that, right? You don’t want the libs to win, do you? Then click that button, bud!
Okay, I’m done begging until next week. Unless you do the right thing now, in which case I might not need to.
"Does he have information that will lead to the arrest of Hillary Clinton?" gave me a belly laugh. 5 months isn't NEARLY enough for the pain he caused, but given he and everyone else expected no jail time, it's good enough for now.
"It sounds... like something _I_ would say." Chappelle is so good at his craft.
Big Fan of the Hitchhiker's Guide Quintology (?) but have never heard of that game. Minesweeper's about my speed so maybe I can actually handle something from the Clinton Era. My favorite quote, passage really, from the series includes this tidbit:
“Thank you. Since we decided a few weeks ago to adopt the leaf as legal tender, we have, of course, all become immensely rich.”
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Ford stared in disbelief at the crowd who were murmuring appreciatively at this and greedily fingering the wads of leaves with which their track suits were stuffed.
“But we have also,” continued the management consultant, “run into a small inflation problem on account of the high level of leaf availability, ..."
............................................................................................
Just stuff $1.5T in leaves into your track suit and this years' budget will be all squared up.
- from Restaurant at the End of the Universe. https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/685739-if-the-management-consultant-said-tersely-we-could-for-a#:~:text=%E2%80%9CThank%20you.,their%20track%20suits%20were%20stuffed.