Hunter Biden Is Just Full of Surprises

And, of course, drugs

Well, whaddaya know? I figured the fix was in.

But no, Hunter Biden was actually found guilty of a crime. In a courtroom. With a judge and jury and lawyers and everything. The court said, “Yeah, we know you’re the president’s son, and good for you, but we’ve looked at all the evidence and you definitely did the thing you’re accused of doing.”

Joe Biden’s presidency really is historic!

And unlike Donald Trump’s felony conviction, you can actually explain to people in 25 words or less what Hunter did wrong.

It’s also a satisfying result after that shady plea deal Hunter tried to make last year. I’m no lawyer, but it sounded like he basically wanted a Get Out of Jail Free card and the judge wouldn’t play along.

A child of privilege, a wealthy white male, has been reminded that the law applies to him too. If only he were a Republican, so our friends in the media could enjoy it too.

Instead, they’re busy pumping out sob stories about how distraught Joe Biden is. You see, the story is actually about a father’s love for his son.

“Joe Biden is such a good dad!” Oh, is that why Hunter is a junkie whoremonger whose life of indolent luxury is funded by utterly corrupt influence peddling? Is that why Hunter tried to deny paternity of his own daughter, who his father only acknowledged under duress and has gone back to ignoring?

Hunter is everything the left hates about Trump. Plus illegitimate children and crack cocaine.

But!