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Fetterman's Lines Were Canned, But He Couldn't Read the Labels

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Fetterman's Lines Were Canned, But He Couldn't Read the Labels

"Good night," he began

Jim Treacher
Oct 26, 2022
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Fetterman's Lines Were Canned, But He Couldn't Read the Labels

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“Hi. Good night, everybody.”

That’s how Senate candidate John Fetterman began his first and only debate of the 2022 election, and it turned out to be the high point of his evening.

I watched the whole thing, and it was the longest hour of my life that didn’t involve some sort of surgery. Fetterman had obviously prepared some canned lines, but they got all jumbled up because he couldn’t read the labels.

Fetterman kept trying to make “the Oz Rule” a thing — calling his opponent a liar, basically — and it might have worked if he’d been able to use it in a sentence.

The fine folks at the Washington Free Beacon have condensed a full hour of Fetterman’s stroke-addled babbling into 90 seconds:

A few of Fetterman’s bon mots:

“He got his Pennsylvania house from his own inlays! From a dollar!”

“I do support fracking, and I don’t, I don’t... I support fracking, and I stand, and I do support fracking.”

“My doctoral believes that I’m fit to be serving, and that’s what I believe is where I’m standing.”

“Everybody in Braddock, an overwhelmingly majority community of black, uh, community all understood what happened. Y’know, they understood what happened. And everybody agreed that, and nobody believes that it was anything about me making a split-second decision to defend our community as well.”

“Again, I just can’t just say one thing other than that Dr. Oz would not support and he would support cutting Medicare.”

“I just believe. I just, making it that much more, it, it costs too much, and I believe providing the resources to reduce the tuition allow families to be able to afford it.”

“Dr. Oz loves free, free money when it’s a half a million dollar tax break on one of his homes down on the ranch in Florida, and whether it was a $50 tax break, you know about his farm in Montgomery County. So it’s about supporting and helping, y’know, young earners… excuse me, young… young, uh… young, y’know, students…”

Then Fetterman closed with this outburst:

Twitter avatar for @greg_price11
Greg Price @greg_price11
Fetterman yells "YOU WANT TO CUT SOCIAL SECURITY" during Dr. Oz's closing statement.
12:58 AM ∙ Oct 26, 2022
2,694Likes607Retweets

Clearly, the campaign staff and journos (what’s the difference?) who told us Fetterman is fine were lying. And they continued to lie, even after their lies were exposed:

Twitter avatar for @BrendanMcP
Brendan McPhillips @BrendanMcP
So proud of @JohnFetterman who stood up tonight to do something incredibly hard under the best of circumstances, but did it only 5 months into his recovery. What we saw was a brave fighter going to bat for every Pennsylvanian who's been knocked down and tried to get back up.
2:00 AM ∙ Oct 26, 2022
10,230Likes1,778Retweets

Twitter avatar for @PhilipWegmann
Philip Melanchthon Wegmann @PhilipWegmann
Fetterman Campaign spokesman "for a guy who's just been in the hospital months ago, he took it to Dr. Oz pretty fucking hard tonight."
1:26 AM ∙ Oct 26, 2022
2,024Likes189Retweets

Twitter avatar for @BonillaJL
Jorge Bonilla @BonillaJL
Leland Vittert suggests that Oz spoke quickly in order to defeat Fetterman's closed captioning
1:14 AM ∙ Oct 26, 2022
159Likes28Retweets

Twitter avatar for @karaswisher
Kara Swisher @karaswisher
“Tonight’s hour-long exchange was, in some ways, a Rorschach test of comfort with disability … We are a culture of soundbites, mic drops, and clap backs. To speak in any way that deviates from the norm is to summon ridicule and judgment.”
4:21 AM ∙ Oct 26, 2022
273Likes42Retweets

Twitter avatar for @feministabulous
Liz Plank @feministabulous
when your side is so bad you have to rely on ableism to win https://t.co/3iTWIKXTPy
Twitter avatar for @Julio_Rosas11
Julio Rosas @Julio_Rosas11
Fetterman just melts down after a long pause when confronted about his flip flopping on fracking. https://t.co/ceGtuNt61J
1:07 AM ∙ Oct 26, 2022
1,203Likes207Retweets

It’s ableist to notice that Fetterman is unable to comprehend and speak language.

Putting Fetterman on a debate stage is like putting Stevie Wonder in a stock car. Now his team is blaming the other driver for not crashing.

Has Fetterman’s disastrous debate performance hurt his campaign? I don’t see how it can help. But the people who were planning to vote for him yesterday are still planning to vote for him today. And the people who’ve already cast their ballots in early voting can’t take them back. They’ll find some way to rationalize Fetterman’s obvious unfitness for office, because that’s what partisans do when they’ve been proven wrong. It’s too late to back out now.

Good night, everybody!


Twitter avatar for @jtLOL
jimtreacher.substack.com @jtLOL
Day 421 of Americans stranded in Afghanistan.
11:29 AM ∙ Oct 26, 2022

Twitter avatar for @jaredbkeller
Jared Keller @jaredbkeller
"Members of Afghanistan’s elite National Army Commando Corps, who were abandoned by the U.S. and Western allies when the country fell to the Taliban last year, say they are being contacted with offers to join the Russian military to fight in Ukraine"
bit.lyRussia’s Recruiting Afghan CommandosAbandoned special forces veterans are getting job offers for a very different kind of battlefield.
8:54 PM ∙ Oct 25, 2022
38Likes42Retweets


COVID-19 is back to being a pandemic, a month after President Biden declared it was over:

Twitter avatar for @RyanAFournier
Ryan Fournier @RyanAFournier
Biden today: Covid is a “global health emergency” Biden one month ago: “the pandemic is over.”
6:39 PM ∙ Oct 25, 2022
1,914Likes752Retweets

And noted medical expert Karine Jean-Pierre had this to say:

Twitter avatar for @townhallcom
Townhall.com @townhallcom
KJP: "You're going to get this protection once a year, like the flu shot."
7:29 PM ∙ Oct 25, 2022
94Likes55Retweets

Oh yeah? Since when?


Sometimes I wonder how Dems can make excuses for John Fetterman. Then I remember who the leader of their party is:

Twitter avatar for @thefacts_UK
Facts UK @thefacts_UK
🚨 | WATCH: Joe Biden congratulates “Rashid Sanook” on becoming Prime Minister
10:08 AM ∙ Oct 25, 2022
1,570Likes437Retweets

Rashid Sanook, Rishi Sunak, whatever. At least Joe is trying, isn’t he? I mean, it’s not like he’s a Republican.


Today is a very special day. Did you forget? Don’t tell me you forgot!

Twitter avatar for @HillaryClinton
Hillary Clinton @HillaryClinton
Happy birthday to this future president.
Image
1:03 PM ∙ Oct 26, 2016
128,185Likes58,858Retweets

Hey, she’s still got time. On January 20, 2025, she’ll be almost a year younger than Biden was when he was sworn in. Anything can happen, unfortunately!


Happy Hump Day. It’s been sunny and unseasonably warm in Indiana for the past week, which stinks. But today it’s cold and rainy and miserable. Ahhhh, that’s more like it!

I’m halfway through the new Jack Reacher book. Lee Child and his brother Andrew1 have been splitting up the writing duties for the last few books, and I’m still not sure how I feel about it. But as usual, there’s something comforting about Reacher always being smarter and stronger and faster and tougher than the bad guys. Not only does he always win, the bad guys are always satisfyingly humiliated. He’s like an itinerant Batman. Sherlock Homeless.

Hey, give me some money so I can buy more books!

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Or whatever their real names are, I don’t feel like looking ‘em up.

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Fetterman's Lines Were Canned, But He Couldn't Read the Labels

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Marie Griffin
Oct 26, 2022

"Putting Fetterman on a debate stage is like putting Stevie Wonder in a stock car" - Best line ever.

Watching the debate, I couldn't help but think that this would be like Gabby Gifford's husband insisting that she get out on the campaign trail after being shot in the head. Fetterman is suffering a form of brain damage and it is absolutely pathetic that the PA dems would think that he is a better candidate than Conor Lamb. It's an insult to the people of PA to shove him out there as a serious candidate. Like Biden's family, Fetterman's family should be charged with abuse for using him for their own ends.

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A Duck on a Bike
A duck on a bike
Oct 26, 2022·edited Oct 26, 2022

Lemme see if I got this right: Fetterman STANDING UP for an hour is proof he's a fighter and deserving of being in the senate? Is that right?

I think the affect of this "Debate" will be to assuage the undecided that sending Braindamagedman to the Senate is a bad idea. In that way it moves the needle to the least-worst candidate, Dr. Oz. It won't convince hard core D's to stop supporting him, because they support "the brand" (as the kids say these days) and they know that he's just a stand-in for his wife, who is the real candidate. What really matters to them is keeping control of the senate. Pure power politics. See, I can't do that. I can't be so machiavellian as to just "vote blue no matter how brain damaged because we know best." I can't do that. Some on the right, they do that, but so many on the left seem OK with it. But, then you wonder "how did we get Trump?" Because you voted who you were told to vote for and you didn't ask questions in the process. That's how you get Trump, or a Trumpian type.

And don't lecture me about being "Ableist," or about how I'm an ista/phobe who "isn't comfortable with the disabled." I won't cede that ground to any shrieking Hadrian. My brother-in-law is disabled, he has had mental disabilities his whole life. As a 55 year old man, he spends his whole day playing video games or watching TV. Yes, his parents didn't get him the resources he should have had, there is no denying that. Now, tho, it's too late. But I wouldn't vote for him for any thing; not for the Senate, or a county commissioner or even executive vice-assistant to the deputy dog-catcher. That has nothing to do with my "comfort" around the disabled, he just does not have the skills to match his clothes, or decide if it's too cold to wear just a t-shirt, let alone exert any level of authority on anything. Uncle Festerman is in the same category.

Why did Bidet get a booster? He just had the Rona. If I get the flu, I ain't getting a flu shot a month later. That makes shit for sense. Unless you like needles or that shot had nothing but sugar in it, I don't buy it. Also, I won't be lectured about Covid. Nope, nope, nope. Take that, and shove up yer clacker. I won't be lectured to about covid boosters any more than when it was just the flu shot. If I get it, I get it. And I won't be getting the flu shot or the boosters. My body, my choice, bitches.

KJP: "You're gonna get this shot..." Oh, is that a fact? Again, how about you don't tell me what to do and I'll just go on ignoring you and everyone else? Sound fair? I think so.

All I needed to know about Rishi Sinuk (and if I spelt that wrong, I don't give a shit) I learned from the highly underrated Russell Brand. I beg you to find his video from yesterday about this stuffed suit, potted plant of a WEF mole. It is very eye-opening. Especially his fake news story about him filling up his car and getting some soda and candy. Totally normal shit, you know. But he borrowed the car from someone, so he wouldn't be on camera filling up his Jag. That is totally not normal. Oh, and his wife/spouse/life partner has residency on some tax shelter island so they avoid paying any taxes. Must be nice.

Must. Be. Nice.

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